E. 21 - You Are Not Stuck — What the Science Actually Says About Stress and the Nervous System (Part 2 of 2)
This is Part 2 of a two-part series on the language of trauma, the science of stress, and what it actually means to be human right now. Start with Part 1 if you haven't yet.
If you’ve spent any time in the therapy or self-help world, you’ve probably heard the phrase "stuck in fight or flight." But what if that’s not actually how the nervous system works?
In this follow-up episode, Lacey gets into the nerdy side of nervous system science to bust some of the most common myths about trauma and the body. We explore why the autonomic nervous system doesn't actually get "stuck," and introduce a more accurate, hopeful framework for understanding your physiological responses: allostatic load and the predictive brain model.
You are not broken, and you do not have a disease that needs to be purged. Your body is simply running an old adaptation that kept you safe in the past. Learn how to give your brain the "prediction errors" it needs to update its software and bring you back into the present.
In this episode, we cover:
- Why the phrase "stuck in fight or flight" is scientifically inaccurate
- The limits of Polyvagal Theory as a biological law (and why it's still a useful metaphor)
- What allostatic load is and how chronic stress shifts your baseline and threshold
- How co-regulation builds our stress response in childhood
- The Predictive Brain Model: Why your brain reacts to the past before the present even happens
- How to create "prediction errors" (corrective experiences) through digestible risks in relationships
Missed Part 1? Go back to Episode 20 — Is Everything Trauma? — to start at the beginning.
Resources & Research Mentioned:
- McEwen, B. S. (1998). Stress, Adaptation, and Disease: Allostasis and Allostatic Load. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences. [3]
- Barrett, L. F. (2017). How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain. (A foundational text on the predictive brain model). [4]
- The Process of Unbecoming by Lacey K. Kelly, LCSW
If this conversation resonated, grab the free ebook of Already Human at www.theunbecominghub.com/alreadyhuman — it's the foundation of everything I make.
Find everything else at www.theunbecominghub.com.