It's okay to be human in relationships.
I’ve been noticing something lately in the way people are relating to each other.
There’s a lot of pressure on relationships right now.
Pressure for values to align.
Pressure to feel safe expressing needs all the time.
Pressure for boundaries to be respected perfectly.
Those things matter — they do. They shape relationships in really important ways.
However, there’s also this sense that if those things aren’t happening consistently, then something is wrong. As if the relationship shouldn’t exist in its current form, or as if someone is failing.
What I keep coming back to is… where is the room to be human with another human?
Because to be human is to be limited.
We’re going to misunderstand each other sometimes. We’re going to show up imperfectly. We’re going to have moments when we’re reactive, distracted, or not our best selves. Even in relationships that matter a lot to us.
Especially in relationships that carry history—family relationships, long-term friendships, people we don’t want to lose but also don’t always feel fully seen by.
I talked more about this in the podcast this week — about how self-respect doesn’t always mean distance, how values can guide relationships even when they’re imperfect, and how not every relationship has to be the closest relationship in your life to still have a place.
You can listen here:
[It’s Okay to Be Human in Relationships →]
I also wrote an essay that goes deeper into the same ideas:
If you’re in a relationship right now that feels complicated or imperfect, that doesn’t automatically mean something has gone wrong.
Sometimes it just means you’re being human together.
I’m in it too.
— Lacey
